Failing is a part of success but, duh, who doesn’t have a fear of failure?
In this world that pushes us to be successful in everything that we do and comparison is always right around the corner, we unconsciously strive to be perfect.
Last week, we talked about figuring out what you want. I assume that by now, you have at least a glimpse of what you want to pursue; what’s next?
It’s time to take action!
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As a recovering perfectionist, I find myself procrastinating and self-sabotaging most of the time because I am so scared to fail and to be disappointed with the outcome of what I had to work on.
Fear is inevitable, but it’s mostly the reason why we feel stuck and lost in life.
Fear of failure, mainly, is why we refuse to take action and decide to do what we want.
So in today’s post, I’m going to share the step-by-step process to help you conquer the fear of failure and follow what you desire to do!
The Three-step Process to Conquer Fear of Failure
Step #1: Understand
The first step to face your fear of failure is to understand where it came from.
Your past experiences influenced what you believe and formed your deep-rooted fears.
One of the main origins of our fear is from our childhood experience.
When we were young, many events and circumstances shaped our understanding and beliefs.
During those times, your mind starts to analyze and see things as the adults in your environment do.
There are actually so many possibilities, and we all have unique stories.
Maybe your family members established fear-based rules, or you grew up in an environment where failure is the opposite of success, and it is unacceptable.
No matter what your fear is, it is crucial to be open-minded and understand the reasons why.
Question your fear of failure, and also understand that failing is not bad. Failure will help us to be aware and to be wiser.
STEP #2: Acceptance
The next step to conquer your fear of failure is to accept it.
Fear exists not to stop you from achieving whatever you want in life but to protect you from harm.
Imagine what it would be like to live without fear. It will drive us crazy!
You have to acknowledge your fear but not let it stop you.
In her book, The Power is Within You (I highly recommend this book, btw), Louise Hay wrote that our fearful thoughts are just trying to protect us, and “trust” is what we learn when we want to overcome our fear.
She suggested that whenever our fearful thoughts come up, we can say to the fear, “I appreciate that you want to help me. And I thank you.”
It’s important to acknowledge our fear, and I know that you’re smart enough to distinguish if it’s protecting us or stopping us from achieving our goals.
Ever since I’ve read about that, I started to talk to my fear every time I feel terrified doing something because I thought I might fail or mess up. I simply tell myself, “It’s going to be okay. It’s safe. I’m not going to die when I do that task.”
By doing so, you recognize your fear and control it more than the other way around.
It’s also important to not fight your fear or whatever your emotions. Sit with your fear, acknowledge it, and let it go.
STEP #3: Take a Baby Step
Now that you identified the origin of your fear and accepted it as it is. It’s now easier to take the first smallest, simplest step.
Taking action does not always necessarily mean taking a giant leap. For example, if you decide to shift your college major, you don’t have to pack up and leave real quick.
Instead, take a little step to go forward. In that case, you might want to inquire and learn what your process will be.
In that way, you are not playing safe, and you are not also staying in your comfort zone. It’s like slowly telling your mind by action that it’s safe and you are going to be alright.
You might still find yourself covered with fear, and it will keep flickering in. It’s totally okay.
One exercise to help you feel safer is to imagine the worst-case scenario. It sounds counterintuitive, but it’s helpful!
In this exercise, you have to list all scenarios you could possibly imagine to happen when you fail. After that, think of ways on how you can solve it.
This exercise will help you lessen the intensity of your fearful thoughts. If you find out that you’ll still survive and not end up in jail (you shouldn’t lol) after conquering your fear, then you will be okay no matter what, and you can always bounce back!
There you have it! Those are the three simple steps you can do to conquer your fear of failure.
Again these steps are: Understanding, Acceptance, and Taking baby steps.
Whenever you have fearful thoughts, remind yourself of these steps.
Facing your fear of failure takes courage and compelling enough reason. It will get easier as long as you take action anyway.
You can always go back to basics whenever you still feel unsettled. Discovering who you are will help you understand yourself more and your fears.
How did you overcome YOUR fear of failure or any sort of fear? Share with us some tips in the comments below!
Also – don’t forget to share this article, if you liked it! It means a lot to me.
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Jocelyn is a coffee lover who believes that a bad day with coffee is better than a good day without it. You can find her obsessing over stationery, hanging out with her cat, or singing her favorite Taylor Swift songs.